Thursday, December 18, 2008

The joy of happiness...

I've been trying to remember the times in my life when I was happiest, since the question was posed at Thanksgiving. That's a tough one, because happy is a sort of byproduct of fulfillment, which is a very well-rounded condition that can contain notes of sadness, melancholia, or even pure misery. Happy, even the very feel of the word as I type it, is so damn drenched in positivity, I just want to counter its bias with a lemon-soaked grimace. OK, so taking all that into account, when was I happiest...

Rather than recalling specific times, I'd like to convey a state of being that has occurred on numerous occasions over the years. In this state, there is a distinct melting of inner and outer - a sense of boundless connection between my being and the world around me. In this charmed state, the right words are spoken, the right moves are made, the right people are nearby, the right rhythms flow through all molecules. It's an endorphin bath that spills across time and space. It's music. Not surprisingly, many of these moments are directly related to music - the making of it (when I was in bands and working with my pal Ted), or the simple enjoyment of the right piece of music in the right moment.

Non-musically speaking, being in the same room as my lady can produce high levels of happiness in my bloodstream. Good conversations and rooms filled with constructive arguments too. Writing can trigger the endorphin floods. Sex is nice. Bike rides at sunset are important. All of these things foster a feeling of moving forward in a Universe that is capable of chaos, cruelty, and nothingness, but favors warmth, growth, and engagement. Call it chemistry, call it flow, call it Ishmael, when the moment of happiness arrives, drop everything and embrace it.


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