Friday, March 24, 2006

O v. P

Ladies and Gentlemen...

In this corner, in the white sparkly trunks and the rose colored glasses, we have Opti Mism... and in this corner in the pitch black singlet and deathly pale makeup, Pessi Mism. OK, they've stepped up to their respective microphones and we're just waiting for the bell on Round 1... There it is! Shh. Let's listen...

OPTI: An optimist looks at an oyster and expects a pearl; the pessimist expects ptomaine poison.

PESSI: Nothing worries the pessimist like the optimist who says there's nothing to worry about.

OPTI: For some reason a pessimist always complains about the noise when opportunity knocks.

PESSI: A pessimist is a person who has had to listen to too many optimists.

OPTI: A pessimist is one who builds dungeons in the air.

PESSI: A pessimist tells the truth prematurely.

DING! What a brutal round! They have moved to their corners for prayers and sulking repsectively. A very pessimistic round. Wait, they're at the mics again, and oh, there's the bell for Round 2...

PESSI: He's so optimistic he'd buy a burial suit with two pairs of pants.

OPTI: A pessimist can hardly wait for the future so he can look back with regret.

PESSI: There is no sadder sight than a young pessimist, except an old optimist

OPTI: An optimist sees a green light everywhere, the pessimist sees only the red stoplight.

PESSI: Optimism is the opium of the people.

OPTI: The optimism of a healthy mind is indefatigable.

DING! Well another very tough and punnishing round. Optimism seemed to be on the chopping block there, but let's see who the judges will favor. Wait... wait for it... It's a tie! The judges have heard the arguments and cast their votes (by default) in the name of a "A Sound and Rational Possiblism." I didn't even know he was here today.


Anonymous brian said...

I'm down with O V P....

2:40 PM  

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