Saturday, July 10, 2010

The Identical Bends of the Serpentine...



Big Steve: Let's get in the hole.

Little Steve: No, Let's get in the hole!

Big Steve: Screw you, we're getting into the hole!!

Little Steve: I'm in the hole!

Big Steve: I'm in the hole!

Little Steve: We're in the hole!!!

Big Steve: I know we're in the hole, don't tell me we're in the hole, I know we're in the hole.

Little Steve: The hole sucks.

Big Steve: How can you say the hole sucks? I worked hard to make this hole possible.

Little Steve: The hole sucks!

Big Steve: You suck in the hole!

Little Steve: Who else can we get in here with us?

Big Steve: Don't you dare try to pull Mama Steve into the hole.

Little Steve: I would never pull Mama Steve into the hole.

(Both pull Mama Steve into the hole)

Mama Steve: I hate the hole, it's horrible in here.

Big Steve: Calm down, please why are you so hysterical?

Mama Steve: I don't want to be in this dumb hole.

Little Steve: She doesn't want to be in the hole!

Big Steve: Fine, then leave.

Both Little Steve and Mama Steve: We can't

Big Steve: I'm calling Outer Steve.

Outer Steve (far away): Hello?

Big Steve: Outer Steve get into the hole with us.

Little Steve: Don't listen to him. Get into the hole with us.

Mama Steve: I hate the hole. Get into the hole with us.

Outer Steve: Um... OK, I'm getting in the hole.

Big Steve: The hole sucks.

Mama Steve: The hole sucks.

Outer Steve: Can't we try to get out of the hole?

All: NO!! (Outer Steve ulcerates and gets off the phone).

Little Steve: I'm Calling Nether Steve

Nether Steve (very far away): Hello?

Little Steve: The hole, the hole, get in the godamned hole... I don't have time to explain, just get in.

Nether Steve: I don't want to get in the hole.

Little Steve: I don't care, just get in the hole.

Big Steve: I'm calling Nether Steve.

Nether Steve: Hold on, my other line is ringing.

Big Steve: Hello, Nether Steve, can you get me out of the hole?

Nether Steve: I'm on the other line with Little Steve, I think he wants me to get in the hole.

Big Steve: He's driving me crazy.

Nether Steve: I see.

Big Steve: I'm just trying to get everyone out of the hole, but no one seems to care.

Nether Steve: I care.

Big Steve: Yes, but no one cares.

Nether Steve: Why don't you try to avoid the hole? You always seem to end up there?

Big Steve: I get pulled into it. Believe me it's the last place I want to be.

Nether Steve: You should just try to stay out of it. It seems like an awful place to keep ending up. No?

Big Steve: You're right. The hole sucks. Get into the hole?

Mama Steve: Hello?

Big Steve: I'm on the phone.

Mama Steve: Is that Nether Steve?

Nether Steve: Hi Mama Steve. How are you?

Mama Steve: I'm in the hole. I hate it in here. Can you get me out?

Big Steve: Why are you complaining? Can't you just stop complaining and go back to the hole?

Nether Steve: I think she's saying that she doesn't like the hole. She wants out of it.

Big Steve: If everyone would just stop getting involved, we could be out of the hole.

Beep: Hello?

Little Steve: Uh... I'm still holding. I've got to get out of this hole. I'm leaving. These people are crazy.

Nether Steve: I think everyone wants to get out of the hole, don't they?

Little Steve: Of course not. They love it in here. Let them rot. I'm out of here.

Beep: Hello?

Mama Steve: I hate the hole. Everyone is crazy here. What should I do?

Nether Steve: Get out?

Mama Steve: But what should I do?

Nether Steve: Get out?

Mama Stev: But wha..

Beep: Hello?

Little Steve: Don't challenge me.

Nether Steve: What?

Little Steve: How many times have I pulled you out of the hole?

Nether Steve: Wait, what?

Little Steve: Get in the hole. Get me out of the hole. Bury these guys in the hole.

Nether Steve: It's hard to follow what you're saying.

Beep: Hello?

Big Steve: I can't take it. These people are crazy. I'm getting in the hole.


At this point the universe explodes and our transcript is interrupted.

(Image from "Serpens" by Guido Mocafico)

1 Comments:

Blogger Sarah Bay Williams said...

Your hole may need some pit...
The Pit

7:03 PM  

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