Animals are Republicans...

If you think about it, who's more conservative than animals? They are rigid creatures, set in their ways, with no interest in progress or the welfare of others. They are easily spooked and annoyed at the slightest change in routine. They are hawkish. Aggressive. Insensitive. They destroy nature. They wear fur. They don't believe in science. They wage war with no exit strategy. They want others to clean up their shit. They have a laissez-faire attitude about everything. They drive SUVs. They are self-serving, narrow-minded, and use emotional blackmail and the appearance of loyalty to get what they want.
Animals are republicans.