Zephir's holiday...

If the moon is full and if the pirates have boarded and if music is over and if the pitch is perfect and if the computers are not ok and if the record is about a tree and if the world is rearranging its parts and if you can think about your hands instead of your head and if grapes stay round and if the beef is not sleepy and if the wheels stay hot and if the Bahrainis can channel the Bhutanese and if the turkeys are granted breast reductions and if the goodness and wonder of our best dreams keep seeping in and around the folds of shitty old reality, well then, this monkey just might start reeling in some mermaids. That's a lot of ifs, but what isn't?