The United States of Africa: A tragedy in many parts...

This fantasy blockbuster scenario made some sense last night, but seems more embarrassing in the cold light of today...

2030. The United States of Africa ratifies its constitution, firmly cementing its place on earth as "The New USA" (aka USA2). The USA2 original founders have been exiled to Ireland after an ugly public showdown (and ensuing ponzi scandal) between Nelly Mandela, Bono, and Galyna Qadaffi. Chinese and Indian investors have swiftly moved in and established a political party based around their huge agriculture interests that dominate the center of the continent. They establish a new founding board for the fledgling nation. The cheap labor that was thought to be available to maintain their vast crops and other vertically integrated industries, has dried up in the wake of swelling African pride swells and a raising quality of life index. No amount of number games can generate the highly profitable bottom lines that have been promised by the new USA2 founders.

Meanwhile, Old USA has continued its downward slump. The major cities have been abandoned since they were declared living targets by the United States of Islam (USI). The heartland of the country is plagued by lawless, rival militias who have destroyed the agricultural landscapes unleashing an impenetrable Zone of Terror. Others have moved to the California and Nevada "countryside" only to discover that the polluted deserts are in no way arable and that an a-religious, playful Burning Man spirit of "endless creativity" can only sustain so much momentum. Hunger and turmoil rule the land.

It's only a matter of time before an amendment to the USA2 constitution is passed allowing for "a period of benevolent slavery lasting no more than 50 years," which is widely taken as just reparations for the Old USA's earlier and far more brutal foray into human trade and indentureship.